The Coaching Source

It came to my attention yesterday in a client meeting that not everybody has heard of active listening.  Because in my business it is practically as basic as the alphabet, I forget that it isn’t common knowledge.  So this blog post is for those of you who didn’t get the memo.

What is Active Listening:  A way of listening that leaves the speaker feeling heard to his/her satisfaction.

Listen by:

• Paying attention to nonverbal cues, such as tone of voice or emotion
• Suspending judgment or personal beliefs and opinions
• Using engaged gestures or occasional casual phrases (I see, mmm, right, uh-huh)
• Maintaining eye contact
• Waiting until l the person appears to be finished before responding (don’t jump in just because they pause for breath, or to think).

Respond by:

• Asking clarifying questions to explore meaning and expand understanding
  • Can you expand on that?
  • What happened exactly?
• Paraphrasing what the person has said to acknowledge and conform what you have heard
  • So what I think you said was…
  • It sounds like…
• Verifying observations or intuition to ascertain underlying context
  • Seems like…
  • I sense there might be more…
• Sharing your own related experience – if invited – and then briefly, to demonstrate grasp of point of view or experience.

Practice with your significant other tonight!